The Great Fire of La Torre

I was at La Torre last week, relaxing on the terrace with a glass of Spain's finest to sweep away the cares of another tough day in the sun. Sharing the bottle was the better half who happens to have a nose like a bloodhound - no not pronounced with a wet shiny tip, just very sensitive, quite cute actually.

Sniffing the air she announced "FIRE!" We sprang from our chairs and darted to the edge of the balcony and there 20 feet below was the start of a small fire. "Go and phone someone" I was quickly instructed and lumbered off to obey.

We had stayed on La Torre at the end of June and the owner had left all possible information on the entire Polaris organisation but this time all I could find was the number of the bar, well the owner is a Scotsman (that's one for my nephews) so I called Pino's.

I tried to explain the issue to the young lady who answered. "There is a fire near the apartments beside the first green" I advised her calmly. "Sorry Sir, you have phoned the bar" she helpfully advised.

Before I could launch into my best Manuel impersonation with a shout of "Fuego,Fuego" the missus told me that the Vigilantes had arrived and were attacking the fire with mucho gusto! I arrived back to our vantage point to see that the fire was spreading rapidly along the greenery outside the bunker.

The smoke began to thicken and we began to cough and splutter (more than the usual wheezes) it became clear that the only wise course of action was to beat a hasty retreat to the safety of the bar.

More help had arrived in the form of a brave youth who decided to tackle the inferno with a few well-aimed swipes of a bunker rake. Full marks for selfless endeavour but.........well about as useful as an ashtray on a motorbike.


Meanwhile in the bar we worried for hours as to where we would sleep that night should the catastrophe engulf our apartment block in flames (OK I'm just being silly here but you have to grant some artistic licence) and to ward off our fears we enjoyed several of the many offerings from Pino's Bar.


A long evening turned to black night and we decided to return to base. Just one more obstacle was in place in the early hours, the golf course sprinkler system. As we sauntered down from the clubhouse hoping to follow the cart path home there was a deluge of water for 50 or 60 yards and we had to make a trip down the practice range stumbling through the undergrowth of the heavily planted mounds of palm trees and grasses.
Having scrambled through the scrub we arrived back to find the vigilantes had recruited a small fire truck and to my surprise they were still tackling the aftermath of the fire.
What drama!!

One of the vigilantes told us they had beaten a confession out of a couple of young Spanish kids - OK they didn't actually beat them - who were out walking with their parents or grandparents and had casually asked to borrow a lighter so they could play with the nice bushes, what fun.


The following morning the carnage was apparent. I spoke to one of the ground staff who advised that Polaris were taking no action against the arsonist family despite the fact that whilst the grasses will probably recover and the trees just had some scorch damage, in excess of 1000 feet of the watering system had to be replaced. The good news for golfers is that the cost is not coming out of the greenkeeping budget.

Oh well, at least we survived the Great Fire of La Torre